Microsoft Excel

Details: Written by: Thersa Funsch; Category: Microsoft Excel; Published: 13 September 2023; Hits: 125

Hey you guys, it's me, Jennifer Coolidge, and today we're talking about something so hot, so fab, and yet, so sophisticated—kinda like me in Legally Blonde! Yes, darling, I'm talking about the AMORLINC function in Microsoft Excel. Now don't run away just 'cause it sounds fancy. It's actually really useful, especially if you're handling the finances for your dog's grooming salon or your friend's boutique or whatever!

So, What's AMORLINC?

AMORLINC, darling, stands for "Amortization of Loans Including Cost." This Excel function helps you calculate the depreciation for each period, taking into account different variables like purchase price, and oh, other important stuff!

The formula goes like this:

=AMORLINC(cost, date_purchased, first_period, salvage, period, rate, [basis])

Cost: That's the cost of the item you bought. Like, let's say, a tanning bed for your spa.
Date_Purchased: When you got the fabulous item.
First_Period: When you started depreciating that fabulous item.
Salvage: How much you think you can sell it for at the end of its use.
Period: Which period you're calculating for. Like, the first month, the second month, and so on.
Rate: The rate at which it depreciates. You know, like how fast your mascara runs out!
[Basis]: This is optional. It's how you wanna calculate the days in your month and year. Like, do you wanna be super precise or kinda chill about it?

Give Me an Example, Sweetie!

Let's say you bought a tanning bed for your spa for $5,000 on January 1, 2023. You think you can sell it for $500 after using it for a year, and it depreciates at a rate of 20%.

So in the AMORLINC function, you'll put:

=AMORLINC(5000, DATE(2023, 1, 1), DATE(2023, 1, 31), 500, 1, 0.2)

Here, I assumed the first period ends on January 31, 2023, and we're calculating for the first period (that's why the period is 1).

And voila, Excel does its magic, and you get how much the tanning bed depreciates for that first period.

Why Should You Care?

Well, sugar, if you own anything more valuable than a bedazzled purse, you should know how its value changes over time. Maybe you're a small business owner, or maybe you're just really, really invested in your home spa setup. Either way, knowing this stuff helps you plan financially!

So, there you have it, sweethearts! Excel's AMORLINC function is your go-to gal for understanding how your valuables are doing as they age. A bit like us, huh? Only, we just get more fabulous with time! 💁‍♀️

Till next time, keep sparkling and keep Excel-ing!

Details: Written by: Thersa Funsch; Category: Microsoft Excel; Published: 13 September 2023; Hits: 117

Hey everyone! The Worm is in the house! Y'all know me as Dennis Rodman, the rebound king, the guy who was always flashy on the court and never shied away from doing things differently. You probably don't think of me as an Excel wizard, but hey, even I need to keep track of my finances, man!

What the AMORDEGRC Function Does

AMORDEGRC helps you calculate the depreciation of an asset over a given period. You'll be using this when you've got assets like cars, machinery, or even basketball memorabilia, and you need to know how much they're worth after a few years.

Here's the formula structure, playas:

=AMORDEGRC(cost, date_purchased, first_period, salvage, period, rate, [basis])

cost: initial cost of the asset
date_purchased: the date you bought the asset
first_period: end date of the first period
salvage: the value of the asset at the end of its life
period: the period for which you're calculating depreciation
rate: the depreciation rate
basis: optional, and it's all about the accounting method you're using (0 = U.S. method, 1 = 365 days)

Let's Break it Down with an Example

Imagine you bought a wicked Harley-Davidson bike for $20,000, and you expect it to last five years before it’s only worth $5,000. You wanna know what the depreciation is for year 3, and you're using a rate of 20%.

Here's how you'd break it down:

cost: $20,000
date_purchased: 1/1/2020
first_period: 12/31/2020 (end of first year)
salvage: $5,000
period: 3 (we're looking at year 3)
rate: 20%
basis: We're using 0 for the U.S. accounting method.

You plug that all in like this:

=AMORDEGRC(20000, "1/1/2020", "12/31/2020", 5000, 3, 0.2, 0)

And boom! Excel does its magic and gives you the depreciation for year 3.

Final Thoughts

There you go, folks! Now you've got the tools to figure out how much your assets are depreciating. Even if you're not a numbers guy like me, understanding this stuff is essential, especially if you're looking to make some smart financial moves.

So go on, fire up Excel, and start getting the low-down on your assets. If The Worm can do it, so can you!

Peace out! 🏀✌️

Details: Written by: Thersa Funsch; Category: Microsoft Excel; Published: 13 September 2023; Hits: 101

Kurt Russell: (laughs) Lindsay, good to see you! Look, I know we're both enjoying a night out, but let's take a moment to talk about something super interesting. Ever heard of Microsoft Excel?

Lindsay Lohan: (giggles) Excel? Seriously, Kurt? What's next, you gonna teach me to be an accountant or something?

Kurt Russell: (chuckles) No, no, nothing like that. But Excel's got this cool function called AGGREGATE. It's like a Swiss Army knife for numbers, alright?

Lindsay Lohan: I can barely remember my lines these days, Kurt. And you want me to do math?

Kurt Russell: Haha, I promise it's easier than remembering lines for a Tarantino film. So, the AGGREGATE function lets you do all sorts of calculations without being thrown off by errors or hidden data.

Lindsay Lohan: (sips a drink) Mmm-hmm. You lost me at "calculations," but keep going, Mr. Spreadsheet.

Kurt Russell: Alright, let's say you've got a list of your movie earnings, but some of the numbers are messed up because, well, it was a wild night.

Lindsay Lohan: (laughs) Oh, I've had a few of those.

    20,000,000
    30,000,000
    #N/A
    #REF!
    40,000,000

Kurt Russell: Normally, if you try to average these, Excel would give you an error because of those nasty "#N/A" and "#REF!" things. But AGGREGATE just shrugs it off like it's no big deal.

You'd use it like this: =AGGREGATE(1, 6, A1:A5)

Lindsay Lohan: What are those numbers? Is this Bingo?

Kurt Russell: Haha, not quite. The '1' stands for "AVERAGE," and the '6' tells Excel to ignore errors. And 'A1:A5' is just the range of cells with your movie earnings. So, it would give you the average of the good numbers: 30 million!

Lindsay Lohan: Wow, you make it sound almost cool.

Kurt Russell: Trust me, once you get the hang of it, it's as fun as stunt driving in 'Death Proof.'

Lindsay Lohan: (takes another sip) If you say so, Kurt. Now, how about another round?

Kurt Russell: Sure thing, but remember, if you're trying to calculate how many drinks you've had, AGGREGATE won't help you ignore those! Cheers!

Lindsay Lohan: (laughs) Cheers, Kurt!

Details: Written by: Thersa Funsch; Category: Microsoft Excel; Published: 13 September 2023; Hits: 110

(Note: This is a fictional story and should not be attributed to Morgan Freeman or any other real individuals.)

Ah, well, you see, life has a way of dealing us with numbers—be they numbers representing age, income, or perhaps the average score of a golf game. Now, Microsoft Excel, that wondrous tool of modern office life, has several functions to help you make sense of these numbers.

AVERAGE

Let's start with AVERAGE. This function calculates the average of a range of numbers, plain and simple. You put numbers in cells, you point Excel towards those cells, and voila—Excel does the math for you. The formula might look something like this:

=AVERAGE(A1:A5)

If you have the numbers 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5 in cells A1 through A5, the function will return 3, which is the average of these numbers.

AVERAGEA

Now, moving on to AVERAGEA. The 'A' at the end stands for 'All,' you see. This one is a bit more accommodating; it takes into account not just numbers but also text and logical values like TRUE and FALSE. In Excel's eyes, TRUE is 1 and FALSE is 0. If you had 1, 2, 3, "text", and TRUE in cells A1 through A5, the formula would look the same:

=AVERAGEA(A1:A5)

But the answer would be 1.4, because it takes all these different data types into account.

AVERAGEIF

Ah, yes, then we have AVERAGEIF. It's like the watchful guardian of averages; it only considers the numbers that meet certain conditions. For example, suppose you only want to average numbers greater than 2 in a range of cells.

=AVERAGEIF(A1:A5, ">2")

This would return 4, averaging 3, 4, and 5, but ignoring 1 and 2 because they don't meet the criteria.

AVERAGEIFS

Lastly, AVERAGEIFS. That extra 'S' there? It's the symbol for complexity, or, as some might say, thoroughness. This function allows you to apply multiple conditions. If, let's say, you have one column with ages and another with income, and you wish to find the average age of people earning more than $50,000 who are also under 40:

=AVERAGEIFS(A1:A5, B1:B5, ">50000", A1:A5, "<40")

Ah, isn't it just like a well-plotted espionage thriller? It keeps you on your toes, allowing you to account for all the twists and turns.

So, there you have it: a cadre of functions, each with its own special skills, waiting to assist you in your numerical endeavors. Use them wisely, and they won't let you down.

Details: Written by: Thersa Funsch; Category: Microsoft Excel; Published: 13 September 2023; Hits: 132

(Note: This is a fictional story and should not be attributed to Billy Bob Thornton or any other real individuals.)

Billy Bob Thornton: (sipping on a cup of coffee) Danny, you ever use Microsoft Excel?

Danny Trejo: (leans back in his chair) Excel? Man, I can barely spell it. What's up?

Billy Bob Thornton: Well, you know I like to keep my finances in check, right? So, I use Excel. But today, I found out about this cool function called ADDRESS.

Danny Trejo: ADDRESS? What's it do, send postcards?

Billy Bob Thornton: (laughs) No, no, amigo. In Excel, the ADDRESS function is used to get the address of a cell in a worksheet, based on the specified row and column number.

Danny Trejo: Row and column? Sounds like prison coordinates.

Billy Bob Thornton: (chuckles) You could think of it that way. So, let's say you want to get the address of the cell that's in the 5th row and 3rd column. You'd type =ADDRESS(5,3). When you press Enter, it'll spit out "$C$5".

Danny Trejo: Wait, why is there a dollar sign? I thought we were talking about addresses.

Billy Bob Thornton: The dollar signs just indicate that the row and column references are absolute, meaning they won't change if you copy and paste the formula somewhere else. It's like anchoring it in place.

Danny Trejo: So, what if I want to get all fancy and use different sheets?

Billy Bob Thornton: Ah, you're stepping up your game, huh? You can specify which sheet you want the address to refer to. For instance, if you've got a sheet named "Expenses," you could write =ADDRESS(5,3,4,FALSE,"Expenses"). That'll give you 'Expenses'!C5.

Danny Trejo: Wow, this Excel thing is deeper than I thought. What else can this ADDRESS function do?

Billy Bob Thornton: You can also control the type of reference, like whether it's absolute, relative, or a mix. That's what that third argument is for. You can set it to 1 for absolute, 2 for relative, or 3 and 4 for a mix of both.

Danny Trejo: You're turning me into an Excel warrior, man!

Billy Bob Thornton: Well, you know, Excel's a pretty powerful tool if you learn to use it right. Now, next time you're planning a big heist—of budget numbers, of course—you'll know how to get your coordinates straight.

Danny Trejo: (smirks) You're making me Excel-lent, Billy Bob.

Billy Bob Thornton: And you just made a spreadsheet joke. I'm proud of you, man.

Danny Trejo: Thanks, buddy. But I think I'll stick to acting for now and leave the Excel magic to you.

Billy Bob Thornton: Fair enough. But hey, if you ever decide to branch out, you know where to find me.

Danny Trejo: Definitely, man. Thanks for the Excel lesson.

Page 3 of 5

Haaayyy Excel Lovers! It's All About AMORLINC, Darling!